Creating Possibility

Find What Matters Most to Others

Karen Coulson - Monday, July 25, 2011

Gifts from the heart should reflect the heart of the person to whom the gift is given. Kc

Valentine’s Day has rolled by again with millions of women (and some men) waiting to see what the postman or delivery man would bring. As I watched the scenarios unfold at my office – with flowers and chocolates being delivered,  I suddenly remembered something -  I was waiting for MY surprise but I’d totally forgotten to buy a card or organize something for my husband!

In my anxiousness to ‘please’, I broke a rule I teach others. I bought him  chocolates! You may be thinking because I’m a dietitian, I should have chosen a healthy alternative – like a big basket of fruit – but that would be breaking ‘The Rule’ as well.

So what is this ‘Rule’ I’m talking about?  It’s one that can make all the difference in a relationship – whether at work or in your personal life. And this is it : 

The gift should reflect the values of the person who is receiving it.

It’s probably one of the easiest ways to show others you care – not only are you giving them a gift – you have taken the time to find out what they would value and appreciate. It shows you care enough about them  to find out what  is important to them.

So often, we go to great expense and effort to give something to someone  WE think they want. A few years ago, my son told me he’d like some gym equipment for his birthday… so I bought him a cross trainer. It’s still sitting in the rumpus room not used -  except by me… occasionally. I hadn’t asked him what type of equipment he wanted, I’d put my own interpretation onto his request.  

So if you want to have an extraordinary relationship – find out what the person you care about, cares about. Don’t wait for next Valentine’s Day to ask them what it is that you can do or say to have them feel you love them. And the most important part – act on it!!  It will lift the energy of your relationship to another level.

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